Category Archives: life

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My First Post

I am loving my new life as a blogger, but very scared!  It has been something I wanted to do for a long time.  I have actually had stomach aches, and headaches, leading up to this launch, but most exciting are the butterflies I have in my tummy!  This is really going down, and I am dedicated myself to my new project!  I plan on sharing many things here on girlfriend411, and I look forward to hearing about all the things you have going on in your life!  So please sit back, enjoy, and take this journey with me as I serve it up in my new blog, girlfriend411!



Thank You

There is nothing like having the love and support of your family.  Rochelle and I have to thank our families for always being supportive and going along with some of our wild and crazy ideas.  The love you give us is priceless.  There is no word to describe how much we love you.   Thank you for coming on this crazy journey with us.  We love you to the moon and back!

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OMG I’m a Blogger…

Me, the non techy, subconscious writer is officially a blogger!  Oh boy… I just had my official word press lesson and I must say not so bad.  OK, so here it is I am nervous, I don’t really know why, but I am.  Maybe it’s the fact that I feel a little exposed here, but I guess that is one of the beauties of blogging.  RELEASING, CLEANSING, DISCOVERING….Whenever my girlfriends and I get together it is usually filled with a candle being passed around.  I started this weird tradition because I want them to know that the floor is all theirs and mine, our time to share.  When the candle is given to you, that is the signal that means its your time to let it all out; the good, the bad, pretty and ugly.  Whatever is going on in your life big or small, share it with your girls.  So I guess now the virtual candle is on me… So here’s what’s new…I am officially a blogger, and terrified!!! The kids are great! My oldest is 17 and looking at colleges, my 6 year old started kindergarten and is so amazing, and my 7 month old is not sleeping through the night, still nursing and trying so hard to get him to stop which has not been fun, standing up in his crib and moving all around.  My three sons! And my wonderful husband supporting my journey once again; although he has told me I can’t put anything about him in my blog or he will sue me.  Oh and Malcolm my chocolate Lab has been behaving pretty well.  He hasn’t run away in months now, however he did eat my baked ziti that was left on the stove.  Overall I just feel blessed. Now I am passing the candle to you…What’s going on?


Giving Brings Me Joy

If you know me, you know that I give and sometimes help folks to a fault.  But the truth is, I would not have it any other way.  Some folks find hobbies, take up a trade, go to the spa, but I actually find my greatest point of happiness and relaxation is when I am helping other folks.  Sometimes it’s just lending an ear; sometimes it’s words of encouragement after a really bad day, and sometimes it’s inviting five of my closest friends over for spa day at my house, or drinks during Happy Hour.  For me, it’s all about uplifting folks, helping folks achieve their dreams and conquer their fears.  I really get a high from showing people that the sky is the limit, and that they can limit themselves by their own barriers.

There are times I should be doing work, or taking care of my family, but instead I am helping someone who needs help and I go hard.  If you know me, you know that I don’t take no for an answer.  I love to see people hit a turning point, see their capabilities, connect folks for jobs and with mentors; it’s all in my blood!  I love people, and have no problem spending my time to help and guide others.  Sometimes I just run on autopilot, and even I don’t know how I will make the impossible happen.  I just jump right in, and I make it happen!

I have a gift, and God has really enabled me to use my talents to help uplift people; empower their self-esteem; save kids; mentor people; provide guidance; help in times of need, and just give back to those who need to be helped at their lowest points!  And it’s not help with money most of the time.  It is usually a helping hand, a phone call, a conversation, or even a hug!  I give of myself unconditionally, and a lot of folks depend on me.  But what I never shared with anyone is that I need them, just as much, because giving back and helping folks gives me my greatest joy!

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The Truth About Balance

To live is to love, to love is to continuously learn and the one lesson that is my focus right now is Balance!… Life can be complicated, there are highs and lows but I know I don’t have to tell you that. I am searching right now for balance. I am being pulled in different directions, maybe even pulling myself in different directions because of not managing my own expectations. This search for balance has been an ongoing journey especially after giving birth to my youngest son. I battle in my head with being the mom I want to be to my 3 sons, the wife my husband deserves, and the ME I want to offer to the world. Maybe the thoughts are just me wanting to find my ultimate purpose and place in the world on a larger scale. How do you balance? That’s the million dollar question and quest. Well, I am on a mission and I hope you can join me and together we will gain a clearer understanding of what finding balance really means. I am sure I will learn and decode what is truth and what is a myth. Perhaps, as I continue this journey to find balance my truth today is that being imbalanced is an opportunity. Rather than viewing my imbalances as mistakes or something negative, I see it for what it is an opportunity to discover, rediscover, change, learn and gain a new balance and way of thinking and living. In areas of my life that I am searching for balance I have decided today I am going to make it a point to try and enjoy every minute even in chaos. To live is to love and to love is to continuously learn. Share your knowledge. What is your truth today?

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What is the Definition of a Friend?

I ask myself this question often. Am I a “good” friend? Is she a good friend? And I realize my answer changes with each friend, over time and as I change. What is a friend? I know that I am a friend and have friends but a clear definition, I don’t have. The simple answer is a person in which you like or have a bond with. Simple right? but a friendship is more complex then that. When I was younger I thought my best friend was beautiful, funny and cool so of course she had to be my best friend. She still has the title of my “best friend” today and are all those things plus so much more! However the older I get my expectations of what a best friend is has changed. It’s funny how life changes you or you view your life differently as you age. The girlfriends I call my friends now may not have the years that my best friend and I have together but they know the me of today even better in some ways then she does. As I reflect I realize that the beauty of a friendship is not the title or years of sharing (although that is special) but in truth the importance is not TIME but rather on knowing YOU…the you of yesterday and today which both with affect the you you are striving to be tomorrow. At some point in all of my friendships we have laughed, cried, argued, agreed, disagreed…they know me today, they have helped mold me, inspired me, mentored, motivated, accepted and loved me and I them! The journey of womanhood is not easy and thankfully I have been blessed and continue to be blessed by being in the company of some amazing woman who openly share their successes, failures, hopes and fears, laughter and tears with me; I call them my gems. My girlfriends! You know who you are! These precious gems I have found along my many different paths are priceless and as my journey continues I look forward to what gems lay ahead on TOMORROW’S path!  Let’s celebrate our gems, tell me about your…

Tip: Surround yourself with “gems” this will only enhance your own sparkle. Make sure the rock you lean on is a gem all other rocks aren’t worth much and may just weigh you down. *Pictured are just a few of the many gems I have been blessed with. I need to get approve to use pictures from some of my other gems, you know how us woman are about our photos so self critical.


Where Did My Baby Go?

I am a proud mom of a very energetic five year old, and for five years now I have been figuring out this Motherhood thing!  It’s hard, I love my son so much and I miss him all of the time.  I often wish that I could stay at home and see him off to school every morning and pick him up from school everyday, but I can’t and I know I can’t, but I feel guilty!  I have to work, and my job is very demanding, but I love it and it keeps me grounded!   I just need to find a way to work and be around to see my son grow into a fine young man!  When I first had MJ folks would say to me all of the time, “oh you better enjoy him”, “He’s going to get big fast”, and so on!  I use to talk about these folks, wondering to myself, why are they telling me this? It’s hard enough with a baby and figuring out motherhood for the first time, I could barely get through the night and he was a baby.  I felt like he was going to be a baby for a long time!  You think your baby is going to be a baby forever!  At first, time moves slowly with the sleepless nights, and then the crawling, then walking.  But a funny thing happened, I woke up one day and we were planning my “babies” 5th birthday party! They were right, those crazy baby advice people, the time does fly by!  It seems just like yesterday that MJ was coming home from the hospital, and now he is in Kindergarten, but I want my baby back!  It’s funny how you don’t appreciate the time you have, and we are always looking for more, or what the tomorrow may bring.  There were times I could not wait for him to get bigger, more independent, out of diapers, and into school.  Now I look back and it’s all a memory, but I am sure thankful for all those memories.  So now I am the lady at the supermarket, or super mom in the kids department, or at the airport stopping all the other moms with babies to tell them to enjoy every moment because they grow up fast!!  Girlfriends cherish every moment, and make every moment count!